I've told some of you the story about this drawing I did. And if I haven't, I think it's still funny anyways.
Jul 30, 2006
A case of misspeak
I've told some of you the story about this drawing I did. And if I haven't, I think it's still funny anyways.
Jul 29, 2006
When they got done, that table looked like (insert Middle Eastern country here).
Work was hell today. It would be funny, seeing a golf course in hell where everyone plays with eyeballs and fibulas, but sadly, that's not what it was. Even with a cool breeze blowing through, the temperature shot up. Unfortunately, they had me mowing fairways today. Usually they go by before lunch if you've got two people, but with one of the mowers broken, I already knew it would be a whole day project. It's terrible getting up there. You think the mower is like a throne, but it really just gets you that much closer to the sun, and when it was getting towards the end of the day, I could actually see my skin bubbling. Grotey.
I managed to make it through the day with only minor heat stroke, but there was no question that I was going to crash when I got home. After a half hour shower I took a three hour nap, but woke up feeling like I was going to puke. I went on over to the High Country, looking every bit as fucked up as I felt. But what's the best way to get over heat stroke? By dusting off a plate of ribs, some baked potatoes and an entire pitcher of water. I should've timed myself. My eating was swift and methodical, and even half way through the meal, while I knew I would need another nap, I already felt 100x better.
Once I got my mind back about me, I got back to my normal people watching that I do up here. Especially at the High Country, you get every kind of person imaginable, and even some that are unimaginable. But my favorite group tonight was this family of all guys (except for the mom, of course) but every single one of them was HUGE! Not the typical fat italian mobster family, but the "pump up your muscles and the gut will surely follow" huge. Even the littlest kid, who was probably about ten, already had the beginnings of a nice gut poking against the hem of his shirt. What was most funny about this family was that they were wearing nike, adidas, harley davidson and UNDER ARMOR! "Some might call it tacky to wear under armor to the dinner table, but what else is going to stretch as much as I do?"
But they were a nice family, and it's kind of how you would expect: all of the kids were loud and animated and the dad sat there with his arm around his smoking hot trophy wife. So I was wondering: Is this the new "American Family"? I don't see why it couldn't be that with all of our adrenaline-obsessed youth out there, who are always eating poorly, but pack themselves into the gym to show off to their smoking hot girlfriends, that this could be a new direction that America is headed in. You can almost see the evolution of the american family happening right before your eyes. But maybe that's how the rest of the world already views us. It certainly follows all the right stereotypes.
I managed to make it through the day with only minor heat stroke, but there was no question that I was going to crash when I got home. After a half hour shower I took a three hour nap, but woke up feeling like I was going to puke. I went on over to the High Country, looking every bit as fucked up as I felt. But what's the best way to get over heat stroke? By dusting off a plate of ribs, some baked potatoes and an entire pitcher of water. I should've timed myself. My eating was swift and methodical, and even half way through the meal, while I knew I would need another nap, I already felt 100x better.
Once I got my mind back about me, I got back to my normal people watching that I do up here. Especially at the High Country, you get every kind of person imaginable, and even some that are unimaginable. But my favorite group tonight was this family of all guys (except for the mom, of course) but every single one of them was HUGE! Not the typical fat italian mobster family, but the "pump up your muscles and the gut will surely follow" huge. Even the littlest kid, who was probably about ten, already had the beginnings of a nice gut poking against the hem of his shirt. What was most funny about this family was that they were wearing nike, adidas, harley davidson and UNDER ARMOR! "Some might call it tacky to wear under armor to the dinner table, but what else is going to stretch as much as I do?"
But they were a nice family, and it's kind of how you would expect: all of the kids were loud and animated and the dad sat there with his arm around his smoking hot trophy wife. So I was wondering: Is this the new "American Family"? I don't see why it couldn't be that with all of our adrenaline-obsessed youth out there, who are always eating poorly, but pack themselves into the gym to show off to their smoking hot girlfriends, that this could be a new direction that America is headed in. You can almost see the evolution of the american family happening right before your eyes. But maybe that's how the rest of the world already views us. It certainly follows all the right stereotypes.
Jul 28, 2006
We Hardly Knew Ye
Let me go on record as saying "MySpace can suck MyBalls." I'm sorry if I faked any of you out and got your hopes up by creating a MySpace account, but sadly, it brings nothing new to the table for me, and I'll have to let it go. Commence fade out: now.
Jul 27, 2006
Jul 25, 2006
It's not scary!!!!!!!!
I don't usually do movie reviews on here because there's enough people out there that have their own opinions in things, but when a movie with as many mixed reviews as Lady in the Water comes out, and you generally disagree with all of the reviews, i think it's my duty to tell it how i saw it. After i read the reviews on RottenTomatoes, which totaled a whopping 19% that liked the movie (right down there with Little Man) I was wondering if they were really on to something and it sucked, or if they're all a bunch of pretentious bastards who don't have a drop of that imagination juice left in their imagination juice sack. When they started describing how the plot made no sense to them, that's when i decided to go see it, and i already knew i'd like it. Generally, "no plot" means "too much plot for me to keep track of."
So Meg n' i sailed off to see it last night and during the movie, I could see why people might not like it. Characters who have no grounding in reality, a lot of (good) dialogue, and (oh my...) it's not scary. Have any of his movies been truly scary? Sure there's scary parts, but when i think about it, was the Sixth Sense "scary"? No. It was suspenseful, but it was also mostly dialogue that just kept you interested until the end. As I recall, i was almost bored before the end of that movie.
But what's amazing about this movie is that while it mixes reality and fantasy, the two parts often cross over, where the real characters start doing extraordinary things, and you hardly even notice. You think it's too far-fetched to believe it, so you start to believe that everyone and everything can be as real or as imaginary as it wants at any point. People start doing extraordinary things, and then the last thing that happened doesn't seem so crazy.
All of this factors into the fact that this was originally conceived as a bedtime story for M. Night's kids, and when it comes down to it, that's what it is. It's a bedtime story in real time, where if you took the plot down off the screen and told it to your own kids before they went to bed, then you wouldn't feel foolish at all, but you'd feel incredibly smart for making up such a dark, funny, imaginative, and engaging story, which would thus make you the best father/mother in the world.
So Meg n' i sailed off to see it last night and during the movie, I could see why people might not like it. Characters who have no grounding in reality, a lot of (good) dialogue, and (oh my...) it's not scary. Have any of his movies been truly scary? Sure there's scary parts, but when i think about it, was the Sixth Sense "scary"? No. It was suspenseful, but it was also mostly dialogue that just kept you interested until the end. As I recall, i was almost bored before the end of that movie.
But what's amazing about this movie is that while it mixes reality and fantasy, the two parts often cross over, where the real characters start doing extraordinary things, and you hardly even notice. You think it's too far-fetched to believe it, so you start to believe that everyone and everything can be as real or as imaginary as it wants at any point. People start doing extraordinary things, and then the last thing that happened doesn't seem so crazy.
All of this factors into the fact that this was originally conceived as a bedtime story for M. Night's kids, and when it comes down to it, that's what it is. It's a bedtime story in real time, where if you took the plot down off the screen and told it to your own kids before they went to bed, then you wouldn't feel foolish at all, but you'd feel incredibly smart for making up such a dark, funny, imaginative, and engaging story, which would thus make you the best father/mother in the world.
Jul 20, 2006
You stole my scent!
I'm not usually one for promoting products that i use everyday, BIGGEST BOOBS ON THE NET! but every once in a while, when I sit down and enjoy a nice refreshing Pepsi, I can't help but marvel at the power of my new favorite household product. No, it's not my wonderful new George Foreman, which takes out the fat, but leaves in the flavor (and even has removable plates), but rather the greatest turd spray in the world. Here it is:
The Lemon Mist Mate doesn't just try to cover up bad odors coming out of your ass, it kills them. No, it doesn't just kill them, it latches on to you and follows you around for the rest of the day and takes out whatever unpleasant smells might be emmanating from you. I even use it as deodorant on occasion. But the best part is, it doesn't come in "mountain spring" or "cayenne pepper" scents... it's just lemon, and the most powerful, potent, and pleasing lemon you will ever come across.
So the next time you've had one too many Starbucks brand grande white chocolate mocha (my personal favorite, as i find it to be the perfect mix between heaven and... oh, who am I kidding, it's just heavenly) then don't forget your turd spray. And you better hope it's Lemon Mist Mate.
The Lemon Mist Mate doesn't just try to cover up bad odors coming out of your ass, it kills them. No, it doesn't just kill them, it latches on to you and follows you around for the rest of the day and takes out whatever unpleasant smells might be emmanating from you. I even use it as deodorant on occasion. But the best part is, it doesn't come in "mountain spring" or "cayenne pepper" scents... it's just lemon, and the most powerful, potent, and pleasing lemon you will ever come across.
So the next time you've had one too many Starbucks brand grande white chocolate mocha (my personal favorite, as i find it to be the perfect mix between heaven and... oh, who am I kidding, it's just heavenly) then don't forget your turd spray. And you better hope it's Lemon Mist Mate.
Jul 17, 2006
I'll show you a Body World
Today I made an effort to be cultured with my family, so we took off down to denver to see the Body Worlds exhibit at the nature and science museum, and since we had a bit of time before they would let us in to see it, we wandered around the outer space part, which was really interesting, but once we'd been through that, we went to get in line for the Body Worlds and then there was a massive power outage throughout the entire building.
Everyone just milled around for a few second, until the fire alarm went off, but even then, all of the staff was looking at each other like "Are we supposed to kick them out?" So it's kind of understandable that people might be confused in this situation, but as we were leaving, there was a couple different groups of people that were saying that the same thing had happened yesterday, too.
As we're leaving then, the fire trucks are pulling in to make sure everything's alright... then we get out onto I-70 and see a massive fire right in the middle of a neighborhood, with the flames bursting up higher than the trees. I feel sorry for those people that lost their house because the fire fighters were more worried about a power outage at the museum. But that's the way the cookie crumbles.
Everyone just milled around for a few second, until the fire alarm went off, but even then, all of the staff was looking at each other like "Are we supposed to kick them out?" So it's kind of understandable that people might be confused in this situation, but as we were leaving, there was a couple different groups of people that were saying that the same thing had happened yesterday, too.
As we're leaving then, the fire trucks are pulling in to make sure everything's alright... then we get out onto I-70 and see a massive fire right in the middle of a neighborhood, with the flames bursting up higher than the trees. I feel sorry for those people that lost their house because the fire fighters were more worried about a power outage at the museum. But that's the way the cookie crumbles.
Jul 14, 2006
A formal introduction
Thanks for that comment, deep throat. I just realized that i haven't told you all about the people i work with, or the machines i work with. Let's start with the people.
Castleman - He's the crew leader and the manic depressive. He's a good guy but he often leaves us hanging. He's always good for a surprise, though... he's the one that told me not to let my meatloaf.
Cupp - He's the oldest and the most senile of them all. He's the one that mows the grass without the reels running (both literally and metaphorically) and who likes to tell the stories that go nowhere.
Old man Vince - He's not that old, but he's kinda like your grandpa. He's the one that's best suited for shovel support.
Mike Kent - He'll probably find this page by searching for his name on the internet because he's a huge conspiracy theorist. That's why he's up at Red Feather Lakes to begin with, to escape everything. He believes that the government dumps metals from planes to help control the weather and thinks that out of all the missiles that Korea has been launching recently, the US hasn't been able to track any of them. I'm totally neutral on the whole debate, but it's fun to hear his ideas... especially after he's smoked a fatty joint.
Dave - Dave, as i've told many of you, is most closely realted to Boomhower from King of the Hill. That's not a bad thing at all, since he's my favorite character on that show. But he's the only guy i'm living with right now, and he's always good company, and he knows a hell of a lot about grass.
Sean and Tara - Both of these two are younger than i am, and they both came in at the same time, both work together, and both got the same bad ideas from Old Man Vince. They were doomed from the beginning. Sean's a good worker, but Tara can be a bit lazy. She's also afraid of pretty much everything from what i've seen.
Buddy - Buddy doesn't work for the grounds crew because he kept stealing stuff from them. Now he works in the kitchen where he steals beer all day. Then when Dan moved out of our house, Buddy stole all of his 2Pac CDs. I was fine with all this, but now i think he stole a CD case of mine which probably had 50 CDs in it, but everyone just keeps saying that I can't prove it. He can burn them if he wants, but i just want them back.
There's a couple more good guys who i have no real problem with, but are all really nice.
Then there's the equipment. The best part about a job like this is making up nicknames for all the machines you use, and so far i've come up with:
Shit stain - This is my least favorite mower. It bucks a lot, it squeals like a little bitch if you try to do ANYTHING with it but mostly it got it's name because anytime you try to turn it takes out a huge chunk of grass behind you and leaves shitty skidmarks all over the course.
Yoda - It's a little green club car with a silver cab, so it looks like Yoda, but also, when you try to drive it, it's just like Yoda said "Do or do not, there is no try." This thing will take off.
Doctor Oc - Just like in Spiderman 2, this huge mower has long arms with all kinds of hoses shooting out in all directions, and you can almost imagine it grabbing it's way along the ground like the classic villain.
The Patriot - This is the greens mower that i usually use and it has an american flag sticking out of the back from the 4th of july. Not much to the name, but it perfectly balances with the other greens mower...
The Injun - Nothing racial, just a cute play on words. But it kind of fits because either a) the middle rell won't cut, leaving a mohawk in the grass or b) it will "scalp" the fringe because the reels don't always come up fast enough.
That's all of the ones that have deserved a nickname so far, but i think it gives you a nice intro into the world that i live and work in.
Castleman - He's the crew leader and the manic depressive. He's a good guy but he often leaves us hanging. He's always good for a surprise, though... he's the one that told me not to let my meatloaf.
Cupp - He's the oldest and the most senile of them all. He's the one that mows the grass without the reels running (both literally and metaphorically) and who likes to tell the stories that go nowhere.
Old man Vince - He's not that old, but he's kinda like your grandpa. He's the one that's best suited for shovel support.
Mike Kent - He'll probably find this page by searching for his name on the internet because he's a huge conspiracy theorist. That's why he's up at Red Feather Lakes to begin with, to escape everything. He believes that the government dumps metals from planes to help control the weather and thinks that out of all the missiles that Korea has been launching recently, the US hasn't been able to track any of them. I'm totally neutral on the whole debate, but it's fun to hear his ideas... especially after he's smoked a fatty joint.
Dave - Dave, as i've told many of you, is most closely realted to Boomhower from King of the Hill. That's not a bad thing at all, since he's my favorite character on that show. But he's the only guy i'm living with right now, and he's always good company, and he knows a hell of a lot about grass.
Sean and Tara - Both of these two are younger than i am, and they both came in at the same time, both work together, and both got the same bad ideas from Old Man Vince. They were doomed from the beginning. Sean's a good worker, but Tara can be a bit lazy. She's also afraid of pretty much everything from what i've seen.
Buddy - Buddy doesn't work for the grounds crew because he kept stealing stuff from them. Now he works in the kitchen where he steals beer all day. Then when Dan moved out of our house, Buddy stole all of his 2Pac CDs. I was fine with all this, but now i think he stole a CD case of mine which probably had 50 CDs in it, but everyone just keeps saying that I can't prove it. He can burn them if he wants, but i just want them back.
There's a couple more good guys who i have no real problem with, but are all really nice.
Then there's the equipment. The best part about a job like this is making up nicknames for all the machines you use, and so far i've come up with:
Shit stain - This is my least favorite mower. It bucks a lot, it squeals like a little bitch if you try to do ANYTHING with it but mostly it got it's name because anytime you try to turn it takes out a huge chunk of grass behind you and leaves shitty skidmarks all over the course.
Yoda - It's a little green club car with a silver cab, so it looks like Yoda, but also, when you try to drive it, it's just like Yoda said "Do or do not, there is no try." This thing will take off.
Doctor Oc - Just like in Spiderman 2, this huge mower has long arms with all kinds of hoses shooting out in all directions, and you can almost imagine it grabbing it's way along the ground like the classic villain.
The Patriot - This is the greens mower that i usually use and it has an american flag sticking out of the back from the 4th of july. Not much to the name, but it perfectly balances with the other greens mower...
The Injun - Nothing racial, just a cute play on words. But it kind of fits because either a) the middle rell won't cut, leaving a mohawk in the grass or b) it will "scalp" the fringe because the reels don't always come up fast enough.
That's all of the ones that have deserved a nickname so far, but i think it gives you a nice intro into the world that i live and work in.
Jul 13, 2006
So it's not just me
Everyone has their own thing going on up here. The entire crew that i'm on is about to explode at each other. It all starts with the fact that our crew leader is a manic depressive, and on certain days, you won't see him at all and won't be able to reach him on the radio.
Then, a step down from that, us people that work hard have to try to regulate the newer people and make sure they know what to do because our boss won't tell them, and then they usually just stand around anyways, and there's nothing that we can really do about it.
And the next step down, the people that really don't do anything... don't do anything (mow without the blades turning... try to keep shovels from falling over...) and they're mad at the boss because the one thing he did this week was tell everyone that they couldn't clock in early and milk the clock by drinking coffee and telling stupid stories about when they were younger and usually end with "so i said 'sure.'" Amazing climax.
Today, one of the harder working guys went home early just because he didn't want to do the bitch job that he felt everyone else should've gotten done yesterday. Maybe he's right, maybe no one's right, but things are gonna go south in the next week.
Then, a step down from that, us people that work hard have to try to regulate the newer people and make sure they know what to do because our boss won't tell them, and then they usually just stand around anyways, and there's nothing that we can really do about it.
And the next step down, the people that really don't do anything... don't do anything (mow without the blades turning... try to keep shovels from falling over...) and they're mad at the boss because the one thing he did this week was tell everyone that they couldn't clock in early and milk the clock by drinking coffee and telling stupid stories about when they were younger and usually end with "so i said 'sure.'" Amazing climax.
Today, one of the harder working guys went home early just because he didn't want to do the bitch job that he felt everyone else should've gotten done yesterday. Maybe he's right, maybe no one's right, but things are gonna go south in the next week.
Jul 10, 2006
Insanity
If you want to see someone go insane, come up to red feather and i'll let you into my house free of charge to watch my mind eat itself alive.
Now the world cup finals are on, and i have to watch the fucking scoreboard on the internet because we don't get local channels on our dish.
Now the world cup finals are on, and i have to watch the fucking scoreboard on the internet because we don't get local channels on our dish.
Jul 9, 2006
I'm tired
It's been a long long time since i've piggybacked posts, and by all rights, it should never need be done, but the coffee is good and I got too much on the mind.
I went to play frisbee golf with some high school friends today and one thing became strikingly clear. I've lost religion. This isn't that great of a revelation knowing me, but since high school, that has been the largest change in my life. Here were my friends and they were planning their whole night around going to church and i look at them and say "I haven't gone to church since easter... and christmas before that." And all of a sudden I'm proud of it, even though i've turned into that semi-christian bastard of a person that i hated a few years ago because they would do everything that the chirstian holidays of easter and christmas entailed except without the religion. They would give their gifts (which were often more elaborate than actual christians' gifts because to them it was all about giving presents rather than the background and the thought of being with family) without any guilt of just using the occasion to get work off and lavish niceities upon themselves.
But now i've turned into one of these people, and i don't know if i mind. I still go to church on these days, but only take a novelty approach to it, and enjoy the beauty of the ceremonies and just use the time to reminisce about past years, instead of taking any actual religious meaning away from it. My sudden decline in religion is because of these "realizations" in me:
1. That organized religion takes too much power and credit away from the individual. People often say think that christianity and other religions that strongly bank on ideals like fate and destiny are opposites when in fact i believe now that they are almost the same. After the Super Bowl, everyone likes to thank God and their teammates for making it possible, so if they truly believe that they couldn't've done it without God, then doesn't it seem like it was only in God's power to make it happen, and thus only fate for you. I say what's more important is the will in every individual that pushes them through every moment, but is entirely dependent on one's own past experiences and upbringing to make them act a certain way. I'm trying to sound smart, but it's just that it's the small, everyday, humanly actions that eventually prepare us for whatever it is we have to do. Unless there is a case of absolute divine intervention, it's more a factor of one's own actions that make up their greatest accomplishments.
2. Religion probably would've been incorporated into society, even without a uniformed approach. The seven deadly sins and the ten commandments do make sense, and they do work, but when you look at it, they're also stuck in our laws and they're all things that are necessary for a society to work. They seem like the most basic laws that could've been established for a true government to form, and maybe this is why as kids come into college and generally start being those damn liberal freaks, they also start to lose religion slightly more as they rebel from rules and mind sets. Also, the seven deadly sins, maybe be terrible to deal with in the afterlife, but here on earth they're just things that you can try to avoid if you want to live a better, healthier life. It's almost more a practice of common sense than anything revolutionary, just like everything i've just written down.
I kind of just spaced out for that whole thing. It was just a mind flow of what has been going through my head for the past couple years, so don't get offended if i'm totally wrong.
I went to play frisbee golf with some high school friends today and one thing became strikingly clear. I've lost religion. This isn't that great of a revelation knowing me, but since high school, that has been the largest change in my life. Here were my friends and they were planning their whole night around going to church and i look at them and say "I haven't gone to church since easter... and christmas before that." And all of a sudden I'm proud of it, even though i've turned into that semi-christian bastard of a person that i hated a few years ago because they would do everything that the chirstian holidays of easter and christmas entailed except without the religion. They would give their gifts (which were often more elaborate than actual christians' gifts because to them it was all about giving presents rather than the background and the thought of being with family) without any guilt of just using the occasion to get work off and lavish niceities upon themselves.
But now i've turned into one of these people, and i don't know if i mind. I still go to church on these days, but only take a novelty approach to it, and enjoy the beauty of the ceremonies and just use the time to reminisce about past years, instead of taking any actual religious meaning away from it. My sudden decline in religion is because of these "realizations" in me:
1. That organized religion takes too much power and credit away from the individual. People often say think that christianity and other religions that strongly bank on ideals like fate and destiny are opposites when in fact i believe now that they are almost the same. After the Super Bowl, everyone likes to thank God and their teammates for making it possible, so if they truly believe that they couldn't've done it without God, then doesn't it seem like it was only in God's power to make it happen, and thus only fate for you. I say what's more important is the will in every individual that pushes them through every moment, but is entirely dependent on one's own past experiences and upbringing to make them act a certain way. I'm trying to sound smart, but it's just that it's the small, everyday, humanly actions that eventually prepare us for whatever it is we have to do. Unless there is a case of absolute divine intervention, it's more a factor of one's own actions that make up their greatest accomplishments.
2. Religion probably would've been incorporated into society, even without a uniformed approach. The seven deadly sins and the ten commandments do make sense, and they do work, but when you look at it, they're also stuck in our laws and they're all things that are necessary for a society to work. They seem like the most basic laws that could've been established for a true government to form, and maybe this is why as kids come into college and generally start being those damn liberal freaks, they also start to lose religion slightly more as they rebel from rules and mind sets. Also, the seven deadly sins, maybe be terrible to deal with in the afterlife, but here on earth they're just things that you can try to avoid if you want to live a better, healthier life. It's almost more a practice of common sense than anything revolutionary, just like everything i've just written down.
I kind of just spaced out for that whole thing. It was just a mind flow of what has been going through my head for the past couple years, so don't get offended if i'm totally wrong.
Another one for the books
Rack up another speeding ticket for me. I've lost count now. Is that bad? The cop said I was going 21 over, which is probably generous in it's own right, which would make it a 6 point ticket, but he knocked it down to 15 over so it'll only be $71 and a 2 point ticket if i mail it in. Good guy I guess, but they were only doing it because there's been an abundance of accidents in recent weeks.
So I'm all good with it, but the frustration sets in when we start chatting and I tell him what I do up here and how when it's this late at night (almost midnight) and i gotta get up early and i'm tired of making this fucking drive so often because I always forget stuff and it's boring as hell... oh wait... speaking of always forgetting stuff, i look over at the 4 bills i have to pay for the apartment i never get to stay in on the seat next to me, and the ticket i've just added to the pile, and i realize i forgot my fucking checkbook. There's the frustration, because i know i'll have to go back down to get that in the next few days, where i'll have to take the time (which has now been extended to 2 hours round trip because i can't speed) just to pick up one fucking thing.
So there's the bills + the ticket + the gas + the... I can't afford this job.
Sorry. Maybe I get carried away, but it gets old, and almost makes me want to quit one of the best jobs i've ever had just because i'm so secluded from the rest of the world and have to make my way between my three homes every day just because i can never keep everything straight. So that's why everyone up here smokes pot and/or does meth.
So I'm all good with it, but the frustration sets in when we start chatting and I tell him what I do up here and how when it's this late at night (almost midnight) and i gotta get up early and i'm tired of making this fucking drive so often because I always forget stuff and it's boring as hell... oh wait... speaking of always forgetting stuff, i look over at the 4 bills i have to pay for the apartment i never get to stay in on the seat next to me, and the ticket i've just added to the pile, and i realize i forgot my fucking checkbook. There's the frustration, because i know i'll have to go back down to get that in the next few days, where i'll have to take the time (which has now been extended to 2 hours round trip because i can't speed) just to pick up one fucking thing.
So there's the bills + the ticket + the gas + the... I can't afford this job.
Sorry. Maybe I get carried away, but it gets old, and almost makes me want to quit one of the best jobs i've ever had just because i'm so secluded from the rest of the world and have to make my way between my three homes every day just because i can never keep everything straight. So that's why everyone up here smokes pot and/or does meth.
Jul 7, 2006
The Swiss, JA!
I know i've been promising a new site for a while, but it looks like that'll take a bit longer than expected, so i thought i'd throw some pictures at ya from my trip to switzerland. Enjoy!
These are the kinds of pictures that you'll get of my family if you ever try it. Charmers, ain't we?
Nothing special here, i just think living pinata donkeys are cool.
First, you have to know that all of Europe is lightyears ahead of america in the category of urinal entertainment. This picture is obviously a frowny face, but when you pissed on it, it changed to a smiley face. This was just one of many, even though it's the only one i got a picture of. Other games include a soccer game with a ball that you can piss into the goal and a target, where if you pissed hard enough it would play the "ole, ole ole ole" chant from sporting events. Fantastic.
This is the top of the Schilthorn, one of the highest mountains in Europe, and right above my favorite place in the trip, a little town called murren. There was also a James Bond movie shot here.
The swiss know their cheese, and this is a cheese factory that we went to where they just rolled this shit out. Here's a picture of their cellar. Each one of those wheels is... fucking heavy... probably 50 pounds, and there's 3 hallways like this.
I like this picture for 3 reasons: 1. It was taken in this huge sampling room at a chocolate factory we toured. 2. My brother is stealthily flashing the international sign for rock and roll and 3. We endlessly made fun of my mom (left side) because she's practically a blur she was stuffing chocolate into her mouth so fast. I was doing it too, but no one has any proof.
This is also the chocolate factory. It's kind of like a covert ops pic that i took, but that was really the color of the room that these poor employees had to work in. But they were eating chocolate in this picture, so maybe life isn't so bad for them.
We've all seen these on planes, but when i was coming back i noticed how they only show one black person in the whole spread and one time he's getting his game on and in the other he's kissing his ass goodbye. Do the brothas let this slide? Perhaps they'd just say "yep, that's us alright." I'm not black, i don't know.That's kind of it for now. If you want more details or more pictures just let me know. And i'll keep working on the site.
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